This morning, when I sat down at my computer with my coffee and my bagel, I intended on catching up on some silly facebook games and e-mails.
Instead, what I found was something that broke my heart.
Last night, a friend of mine (whose name I shall not write) passed away due to complications from a form of vasculitis. She never even knew what she had- because her doctors were far too stubborn to consult with a specialist (much like another doctor I know). Her untimely death comes as a shock, and my heart aches and grieves for her and her family. She is the first person I know to pass away from vasculitis, and her passing is a sobering reminder of the life-threatening disease that none of us ever asked for... may we all continue to see another day with the reminder of our friend in our hearts.
She would have been celebrating her 26th birthday this February. 25 years young, and taken from this earth. My friend was nothing less than graceful in all that she did, what she wrote, what she said, and her compassion towards others was something to be admired and respected. She was always our booster girl, our cheerleader... she vented when she needed to, but always saw the silver lining, always saw the glass as half-full.
Though we never met in person, we talked many times about the difficulties that we face in our lives because of our illnesses. She was the light we all wished we could share with the world.
Today I wish that she were still here to share that light with the rest of you. Her beautiful spirit will live on in every life that she touched.
Rest in eternal, pain-free rest my dear friend.
It always seems that those who bring the most light to the world are taken from us too soon. Not a day will go by that I don't think of my father, my cousin, and my friend. May they give me the strength and courage I need to survive each of these dark days.
Sunday, November 20, 2011
Sunday, September 11, 2011
I'm a working girl now!
(I'm typing most of these entries after the fact, so they are not in chronological order- ahh- but I don't know how to backdate entries.)
I wasn't nervous starting work this year. I was cool, confident and collected, and ready to prove that I know what I'm doing.
Then we had two PD (professional development) days. After the first one, I realized that I was going to struggle a little bit, in terms of "catching up". I know the theories and practices that work, but I don't know the bureaucratic side, the "do this or our school will get shut down" side of things. The morning of the 2nd PD day, the principal asked, "How many of you slept well last night?" Mostly paras raised their hands. Then he asked "How many of you had nightmares last night?" A LOT of teachers raised their hands. I didn't raise my hand for either- I needed choice c- "How many of you didn't sleep at all last night?". All I did was lay awake and think about all the things I wanted to do, how they were going to correlate to the CCLS (Common Core Learning Standards), and how I was going to start the absolutely daunting task of trying to bring my class up to the 5th grade level.
I work mostly with ELLs- English Language Learners. The majority of this class doesn't speak English as a first language, they count among them 6 different languages/dialects- Urdu, Arabic, Haitian Creole, Punjabi, Bangla, and Spanish. I have 5 that barely speak English. I speak none of those languages, but communication isn't the issue in our class. It's the vocabulary, and the prior experiences/pre-requisite knowledge. Most of them read on a 2nd-3rd grade level, with a handful on 4th grade, and maybe 2 on 5th grade level. 2 out of 29. I obviously have my work cut out for me.
I started out this year with 25 students. Then 6 new students from other schools showed up. I have no shows- which may bring the roster down. One student was already discharged, but who knows about the rest of them. Some said they were going back to another country, some said they were moving, others had parents who wanted them in a Charter School, others just haven't shown up yet, but were chronic absentees last year. If the no-shows don't show up by Tuesday, my register will go down to 24, which is pretty incredible, given the number of students in the other classes.
My resources are limited, which makes me nervous. The library in the classroom has about 20 books that are lower level books, 3rd-4th grade level. These kids don't have books at home, they don't have library cards, and I have nothing to offer them. How am I going to teach them to read? How will they built up stamina reading at home each night?
How am I going to do this?!
I wasn't nervous starting work this year. I was cool, confident and collected, and ready to prove that I know what I'm doing.
Then we had two PD (professional development) days. After the first one, I realized that I was going to struggle a little bit, in terms of "catching up". I know the theories and practices that work, but I don't know the bureaucratic side, the "do this or our school will get shut down" side of things. The morning of the 2nd PD day, the principal asked, "How many of you slept well last night?" Mostly paras raised their hands. Then he asked "How many of you had nightmares last night?" A LOT of teachers raised their hands. I didn't raise my hand for either- I needed choice c- "How many of you didn't sleep at all last night?". All I did was lay awake and think about all the things I wanted to do, how they were going to correlate to the CCLS (Common Core Learning Standards), and how I was going to start the absolutely daunting task of trying to bring my class up to the 5th grade level.
I work mostly with ELLs- English Language Learners. The majority of this class doesn't speak English as a first language, they count among them 6 different languages/dialects- Urdu, Arabic, Haitian Creole, Punjabi, Bangla, and Spanish. I have 5 that barely speak English. I speak none of those languages, but communication isn't the issue in our class. It's the vocabulary, and the prior experiences/pre-requisite knowledge. Most of them read on a 2nd-3rd grade level, with a handful on 4th grade, and maybe 2 on 5th grade level. 2 out of 29. I obviously have my work cut out for me.
I started out this year with 25 students. Then 6 new students from other schools showed up. I have no shows- which may bring the roster down. One student was already discharged, but who knows about the rest of them. Some said they were going back to another country, some said they were moving, others had parents who wanted them in a Charter School, others just haven't shown up yet, but were chronic absentees last year. If the no-shows don't show up by Tuesday, my register will go down to 24, which is pretty incredible, given the number of students in the other classes.
My resources are limited, which makes me nervous. The library in the classroom has about 20 books that are lower level books, 3rd-4th grade level. These kids don't have books at home, they don't have library cards, and I have nothing to offer them. How am I going to teach them to read? How will they built up stamina reading at home each night?
How am I going to do this?!
There's caffeine in my blood system.
Well it's back to being a teacher and a student at the same time- no easy task.
Tuesday- work 8:00-3:10. Stay late on Tuesdays to get classroom in order, and photocopies made (+1 hour before work, +1.5 hours post work) Total hours in work: 10 hours.
Wednesday- work 8:00-3:10. Stay late on Tuesdays to get classroom in order, and photocopies made (+1 hour before work, +1 hours post work) Total hours in work: 9.5 hours.
Thursday- Work 8:00-2:20, class 4:30-6:50. (+1 hour before work, 1.25 hours traveling to Hunter, 1.25 hours traveling home from Hunter) Total hours in work & school: 13.5 hours
Friday- Work 8:00-2:20. (+1 hour before work, +1.5 hours post work) Total hours in work: 10 hours.
So adding all those hours up, you get 59 hours. I get up at 5:30am, and leave my house between 6:30 and 6:45 each morning, so add in another 1.5 hours for the time I'm awake and traveling before arriving at work at 7... 66.5 hours.
There are 120 hours in 5 days. Take away the 66.5 hours that I'm busy, you are left with 53.5 hours. Divide that by 5- that leaves 10.7 hours a day to a) run errands b)make and prepare breakfast, lunch, and some days dinner too, c) study and do my own homework d) write lesson plans e) sleep.
I'll let you guess which of the above gets neglected the most... and unfortunately it is one that should be the priority! Being chronically ill (even when you are in remission, like I am) takes a toll on the body. I still have to take maintenance doses of chemo every week- and one of the side effects is extreme fatigue.
But I'm a hard worker and I'm even more desperate to prove myself (aka, be hired full time and aka part 2, keep my 4.0 GPA), so I will sacrifice the sleep. I'll be very happy when I'm finished with my Master's!! I'll hopefully be graduating in December 2012. If not, I'll be graduating in June 2014. (Only because I don't like the number 13). I will have, at the end of this semester, 12 credits down in the TESOL program.
EDESL 796- Methodology of TESOL, 4 credits
LING 702- Analysis & Structure of English, 4 credits
LING 774- Theory and Research in 2nd Lang. Aquisition, 4 credits- Spring 2012
EDESL 777- Sociocultural Aspects of Language and Pedagogy, 4 credits
EDESL 771- K-12 ESL Curriculum & Materials through the Content Areas, 4 credits
EDESL 761- Language Assessment and Diagnosis of Special Needs in TESOL, 4 credits- Fall 2012
EDESL 772- First and Second Language and Technological Literacy, 4 credits - exempt!
BILED 702- Foundations of Bilingual Education- 3 credits- Fall 2012
6 Credits in Foreign Language Study, Langugage 1-
6 credits in Foreign Language Study, Language 2- 6 credits
EDESL 788- Supervised Practicum, 2 credits (Need to have a full time job for this one, otherwise they will make me student teach for a year and that will be a year that I can't sub!!!)
EDESL 760- Master's Essay- 4 credits
18 credits down, 27 to go.
Update: July 2012: 32 credits down, 17 credits to go.
My schedule:
Monday- work 8:00-3:10, class 5:30-9:30. (+1 hour before work, 1.25 hours traveling to Hunter, 1.25 hours traveling home from Hunter) Total hours in work & school: 16 hours.Tuesday- work 8:00-3:10. Stay late on Tuesdays to get classroom in order, and photocopies made (+1 hour before work, +1.5 hours post work) Total hours in work: 10 hours.
Wednesday- work 8:00-3:10. Stay late on Tuesdays to get classroom in order, and photocopies made (+1 hour before work, +1 hours post work) Total hours in work: 9.5 hours.
Thursday- Work 8:00-2:20, class 4:30-6:50. (+1 hour before work, 1.25 hours traveling to Hunter, 1.25 hours traveling home from Hunter) Total hours in work & school: 13.5 hours
Friday- Work 8:00-2:20. (+1 hour before work, +1.5 hours post work) Total hours in work: 10 hours.
So adding all those hours up, you get 59 hours. I get up at 5:30am, and leave my house between 6:30 and 6:45 each morning, so add in another 1.5 hours for the time I'm awake and traveling before arriving at work at 7... 66.5 hours.
There are 120 hours in 5 days. Take away the 66.5 hours that I'm busy, you are left with 53.5 hours. Divide that by 5- that leaves 10.7 hours a day to a) run errands b)make and prepare breakfast, lunch, and some days dinner too, c) study and do my own homework d) write lesson plans e) sleep.
I'll let you guess which of the above gets neglected the most... and unfortunately it is one that should be the priority! Being chronically ill (even when you are in remission, like I am) takes a toll on the body. I still have to take maintenance doses of chemo every week- and one of the side effects is extreme fatigue.
But I'm a hard worker and I'm even more desperate to prove myself (aka, be hired full time and aka part 2, keep my 4.0 GPA), so I will sacrifice the sleep. I'll be very happy when I'm finished with my Master's!! I'll hopefully be graduating in December 2012. If not, I'll be graduating in June 2014. (Only because I don't like the number 13). I will have, at the end of this semester, 12 credits down in the TESOL program.
MA in TESOL program:
LING 774- Theory and Research in 2nd Lang. Aquisition, 4 credits- Spring 2012
EDESL 761- Language Assessment and Diagnosis of Special Needs in TESOL, 4 credits- Fall 2012
BILED 702- Foundations of Bilingual Education- 3 credits- Fall 2012
EDESL 788- Supervised Practicum, 2 credits (Need to have a full time job for this one, otherwise they will make me student teach for a year and that will be a year that I can't sub!!!)
EDESL 760- Master's Essay- 4 credits
18 credits down, 27 to go.
Update: July 2012: 32 credits down, 17 credits to go.
Monday, September 5, 2011
I'm on fire, and now I think I'm ready to bust a move...
I'm still here! I know I really started slacking on my blog after I went to Grandma's house... I start entries and never seem to find the time to sit down and type them up. This weekend I will get back on top of things, I promise!
I've been battling a miserable sinus infection since my last post, and grad school started up again so I've been all over the place. My joints are currently on fire (woo thanks stupid wegeners) so this is a super short entry.
Work starts tomorrow, and then the kids come back to school on Thursday. Wish me luck!
I've been battling a miserable sinus infection since my last post, and grad school started up again so I've been all over the place. My joints are currently on fire (woo thanks stupid wegeners) so this is a super short entry.
Work starts tomorrow, and then the kids come back to school on Thursday. Wish me luck!
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Shamless Plug!
Everyone! My best friend's lover boy has a new album out on itunes- Worth Holding On To - Jeff LeBlanc... he really is awesome, go take a listen, especially if you like easy listening and good vocals.
While I was in college, I was co-chair of our Activities Board. Every semester, we would go to a conference called NACA, and it was all about programming and meeting and listening to musical artists, comedians, motivational speakers and getting lots of free swag.
I missed NACA my junior year because I was in the hospital, pre-Wegener's diagnosis. My friend bff went in my place, and that is where she met Jeff! Fate, I tell you. So yeah, just go to itunes now, click in the search box, type Jeff LeBlanc and download away!
In other news, I'm still craving Japanese food, and I think the kids got me sick yesterday. I absolutely jinxed myself too- I said about a week ago that I haven't gotten sick in months. Now I have to dig out the dreaded Bactrim and hope that I had enough left from when I stopped taking them to knock whatever is in my system out.
While I was in college, I was co-chair of our Activities Board. Every semester, we would go to a conference called NACA, and it was all about programming and meeting and listening to musical artists, comedians, motivational speakers and getting lots of free swag.
I missed NACA my junior year because I was in the hospital, pre-Wegener's diagnosis. My friend bff went in my place, and that is where she met Jeff! Fate, I tell you. So yeah, just go to itunes now, click in the search box, type Jeff LeBlanc and download away!
In other news, I'm still craving Japanese food, and I think the kids got me sick yesterday. I absolutely jinxed myself too- I said about a week ago that I haven't gotten sick in months. Now I have to dig out the dreaded Bactrim and hope that I had enough left from when I stopped taking them to knock whatever is in my system out.
Monday, August 22, 2011
I'm baaaack!
Well I certainly fell off the blogging bandwagon for a few weeks... and I was doing so well too.
Today I am craving Japanese food. Like seriously craving. I dreamt about edamamme, and gyoza and udon noodles... I want soup dumplings and hibachi fried rice... No clue where these cravings are coming from. They remind me of my prednisone cravings. Though if I were still on the prednisone I'd probably want something weird with the Japanese food. Le sigh.
I've been pretty busy the past week. I found out that I'm going to be covering a maternity leave until sometime in November, for 5th grade. I know all my students already- the class is pretty much the same class my mom had last year. A lot of ELLs and F-ELLs, which is great. I'll finally be able to put to use what I'm learning in grad school.
I have so many ideas and things I want to do- but I tend to hit the ground running when I get excited about something like this. So I really need to pace myself and take it one lesson at a time. I am going to use some of the activities my 3rd grade teacher used way back when in the 90s. She was truly the best teacher I have ever had- and so much of what we did in her class sticks in my mind almost 15 years later.
It will probably be a lot easier for me to do what I want to do because I feel as if I won't be expected to tackle all the paperwork that permanent teachers have to do- even though I'll do it anyway. This is my time to really prove myself.
My family reunion was good. Very quiet this year. It was good to see Grandma, and I wish we could have stayed at her house longer. I miss her and I don't like that she is so far away. She will be in NY in about 2.5 weeks, but I still don't see her as often as I'd like to.
I have quite a few posts in the works, mostly all revolving around WG/living with a chronic illness. I've been debating if that is the direction I want to take this blog- I don't want the entire focus to be on my illness though. Eh, I suppose I'll just keep going the way I am, a little bit of this and a little bit of that all over the place.
My Summer Reading post has been updated too! I've read a few more books and have a handful on my desk from my last library jaunt. I also have a huge stack of textbooks to start reading :)
Happy Birthday to my sister- she is 20 today! Only one teenager left in our house... scary thought!
Today I am craving Japanese food. Like seriously craving. I dreamt about edamamme, and gyoza and udon noodles... I want soup dumplings and hibachi fried rice... No clue where these cravings are coming from. They remind me of my prednisone cravings. Though if I were still on the prednisone I'd probably want something weird with the Japanese food. Le sigh.
I've been pretty busy the past week. I found out that I'm going to be covering a maternity leave until sometime in November, for 5th grade. I know all my students already- the class is pretty much the same class my mom had last year. A lot of ELLs and F-ELLs, which is great. I'll finally be able to put to use what I'm learning in grad school.
I have so many ideas and things I want to do- but I tend to hit the ground running when I get excited about something like this. So I really need to pace myself and take it one lesson at a time. I am going to use some of the activities my 3rd grade teacher used way back when in the 90s. She was truly the best teacher I have ever had- and so much of what we did in her class sticks in my mind almost 15 years later.
It will probably be a lot easier for me to do what I want to do because I feel as if I won't be expected to tackle all the paperwork that permanent teachers have to do- even though I'll do it anyway. This is my time to really prove myself.
My family reunion was good. Very quiet this year. It was good to see Grandma, and I wish we could have stayed at her house longer. I miss her and I don't like that she is so far away. She will be in NY in about 2.5 weeks, but I still don't see her as often as I'd like to.
I have quite a few posts in the works, mostly all revolving around WG/living with a chronic illness. I've been debating if that is the direction I want to take this blog- I don't want the entire focus to be on my illness though. Eh, I suppose I'll just keep going the way I am, a little bit of this and a little bit of that all over the place.
My Summer Reading post has been updated too! I've read a few more books and have a handful on my desk from my last library jaunt. I also have a huge stack of textbooks to start reading :)
Happy Birthday to my sister- she is 20 today! Only one teenager left in our house... scary thought!
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Country roads, take me home, to a place where I belong...
I feel like I haven't posted in days, but it really hasn't been that long.
I have a very long post saved in my drafts but it isn't ready to be published.
I'm headed out to West Virginia for my family reunion- I'll probably be posting within the next few days. Maybe I' will work on some of my fiction pieces-
I have to be in the car in 4 hours and I'm not even tired... guess this means I will be asleep most of the drive!
I have a very long post saved in my drafts but it isn't ready to be published.
I'm headed out to West Virginia for my family reunion- I'll probably be posting within the next few days. Maybe I' will work on some of my fiction pieces-
I have to be in the car in 4 hours and I'm not even tired... guess this means I will be asleep most of the drive!
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